Where do fish stay on a campsite?
Fish stay in tentacles while they are camping!
What do jellyfish and a girl after prom night have in common?
They can't be deboned.
I got an email today saying I could win $10,000 in a fishing competition.
But I'm sure there's a catch involved somewhere.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Oysters don’t share their pearls because they’re shellfish!
What do fish use for money?
Sand dollars!
What did one fish say to the other?
If you keep your mouth closed you will not get caught.
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
What’s in the middle of a jellyfish?
A jelly button.
Why did the fish cross the road?
The chicken had the days off!
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
‘I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!’
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
What do you call a jellyfish on a plane?
A flightoplankton.
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
What is a pirate’s favorite’s fish?
A pirates favorite fish is a swordfish!
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
Why are mice afraid of the water?
Because of catfish.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse?
The Codfather.
How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With tentacles!
What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.
What kind of fish do you find in a bird cage?
A perch!
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
What fish like to fly?
Flying Fish
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
Why couldn’t the clownfish buy a house?
The fish could not buy a house because he didn’t have an-e-mon-e!
Why don’t fish play basketball?
Because they're afraid of the net.
Why do fish not like computers?
Because they are worried about getting caught in the Inter-net.
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
What is the most expensive kind of fish?
The goldfish.
What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
Whale, whale, whale…
If it isn’t a pod.
Which day do fish hate the most?
Fry-day.
What fish perform at the circus?
Clown fish!
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
What sea creature never tells the truth
A lion fish.
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles!
Would you rather kiss a shark or a jellyfish?
A jellyfish. That’s a no-brainer.
How do you catch an electric eel?
You can catch an electric eel with a lightning rod!
Why are goldfish orange?
The water makes them rusty.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put the fish in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner.
What's a fish's favorite musical instrument?
A bass guitar.
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