Why does the fairy kingdom smell so awful?
Because of all the toad stools.
What do you call the dandruff found on unicorn manes? Horn flakes.
Why are gnomes so pragmatic?
They don’t have tall tales.
When my daughter said she saw some chubby unicorns at the zoo, I couldn’t believe it. But it turns out it was just rhinos.
Call me on the shellphone.
What do you call a gnome priest?
A compact disc.
What do you call Dragon with no silver?
A dron.
---
You think dinosaurs are scary?
Imagine dragons!
What happens to elves who misbehave?
They get the sack.
A dyslexic witch cursed me!
Now everything I touch turns to glod, an increasingly disgruntled gnome.
Did you hear the one about the genius unicorn who aced every subject? Yeah, he was a real A corn.
Why do dwarves hunt dragons in the morning?
Because the early beard gets the wyrm.
I'm a fairy.
My name's Nuff. Fair enough.
Did you hear about the gnome rogue?
Of course not, that g is silent!
What is an elf’s favorite band?
The Pixies.
Gnome Chat Up Line: Hey girl, is your name Juliet? ‘Cause my name is Gnomeo.
Unicorns deserve to be banned from facebook because all they do is poke people all day.
Have you seen Jake’s new custom trumpet? Yeah, that’s quite a unique horn, I’d know it anywhere.
When the unicorn lost his job, there was nothing funny about being canned corn anymore.
What did Peter Pan call Tinkerbell when she corrected his spelling?
A Diction Fairy.
Why did the gnome take the subway to work?
Because a metro-gnome is always on time.
What do you call a cloud that looks like a mermaid?
Aerial.
Where did Santa's little helpers go to high school?
They didn't, they were gnome-schooled.
Did you hear about the Elf booted from the chorus?
He couldn't Fa-la-la-la-long.
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
What do you get if you cross a gnome and a tauren?
A mini-taur.
The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake!
I’ve heard of fraudsters before, but that was one heck of a unique-con if I ever saw one.
Did you hear about the elf who was a little hard of hearing?
She had to keep saying "Sleigh, what?"
Did you hear a gnome's favorite sport is baseball?
They love to score gnome runs.
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights.
Why did the dyslexic elf get fired?
He kept writing "From Satan" on children's New Year presents.
Why did the gnome visit his mother?
To get a gnome-cooked meal.
Would you call a hardy unicorn that survived disease an immunicorn?
Uni-corn? I though that’s what you call a single grain or maize.
I just paid for a boat ride to a magic themed renaissance carnival. The price was reasonable.
It was a fair fairy faire ferry fare.
What do elves eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes!
After a long day at work, I feel like half a mythical creature...
Because I'm Dragon Ass.
Gnomes don’t understand jokes, they go right over their heads.
Don't fork-get your manners.
Why did the pre-pubescent dragon lose the rap battle?
He couldn't spit hot fire yet.
"Don’t be elfish," said momma elf to her son. "Share with your sister."
What do elves learn when they go to school?
The elf-abet.
A gnome walks into a bar, and the bartender starts a tab for him. The gnome keeps pounding them away, one after the other. After a few hours, the gnome decides to call it a night. The bartender hands him his tab when the gnome realizes he left his wallet at home. He turns to the bartender and says, "Sorry, I'm a little short."
Six out of seven dwarfs aren’t Happy.
What kind of music do elves listen to?
Wrap music.
What is the little mermaid’s favorite font?
Arial.
Famous mermaid saying: Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
Someone stole my lawn gnome that was under my porch!
Who would stoop so low?
Why did the rude unicorn not say hello to the other? Because while the pace (face) was familiar, he
just couldn’t remember the mane (name).
Did you hear about the new holistic elf doctor?
He's a gnome-opath!
Go to BabaMail
