Jokes that are either one liners, puns, knock knock jokes or funny pick up lines as well as some funny insults and comebacks.

Say what you want about waiters, but I think they bring a lot to the table.
What do you call a magician that lost his magic?
I was just looking at my ceiling. I am not sure if it’s the best ceiling in the world, but it’s definitely up there.
What genre are national anthems?
My singing voice sounds bad in my tiny apartment.
It’s a little flat.
What is heavier, a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
The feathers.

Because you have to live with the weight of what you did to those poor birds.
Why did the blonde give up online shopping?
The trolley kept falling off the computer.
He named the street he built after his wife.
It was very apt, as she was cold, hard, cracked and only got ploughed around Christmas.
What did 2 tell 3 when he saw 6 acting like an idiot?
Don’t worry about him. He’s just a product of our times.
Mountains aren't just funny.
They're hill areas.
What do you call a reindeer ghost? A cari-boo!
What do you call an elf who runs away from Santa's Workshop? A rebel without a Claus!
Santa's beard is so long because he's bad at shaving. Why do you think they call him Saint Nick?
How do the elves clean Santa's sleigh on the day after Christmas? They use Santa-tizer!
What name does Santa Claus use when he takes a break from delivering gifts? Santa Pause!
Reindeer don't go to school—they're elf taught.
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve!
How do sheep greet each other during the holidays? Fleece Navidad!
What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells, jungle bells…
What did one ornament say to another? I like hanging with you.
What is Santa's favorite breakfast food? Snow-flakes.
What do you call someone who's obsessed with Christmas? Santa-mental.
How does Santa capture photos? With his North Pole-oroid.
What do you call Santa when he accidentally falls into the fireplace? Krisp Kringle.
What was Santa's best subject in school? Chemistree.
Where does Santa stay when he goes on vacation? At a ho-ho-ho-tel.
What did Santa name his dog? Santa Paws!
Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh? He wanted to see time fly!
What genre of music do elves love to listen to? Wrap.
What do you call a party for snowmen? A snowball.
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