Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
Q. How do the doe and stag open the entry to their vacation cabin in the woods?
A. They just turn the deer knob.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.