What does Minnie Mouse drive?
A Minnie van!
What has one horn and gives milk? A milk truck.
What stays in the corner and travels all over the world? A stamp.
Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
What does one volcano say to the other?
I lava you!
What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer? The Space bar!
What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and wooden engine? it wooden go!
Did you hear the joke about the germ? Never mind. I don't want to spread it around
Why are teddy bears never hungry?
They’re always stuffed!
What do you call two fat people having a chat? A heavy discussion
What’s a good name for a detective?
Mr. E
Can I tell you a joke about paper. Nah, never mind, its tearable.
What belongs to you but others use more? Your name
Why did the birdie go to the hospital? To get a tweetment.
Why did the traffic light turn red? You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!
What did Delaware? a New Jersey
Little Johnny's teacher said,
"Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister's."
"Did you copy hers?" she asked.
Johnny replied, "No, teacher, it's the same dog!"
What is considered the tallest building in the world?
The library, because it has so many stories.
What do you call a person that chops up cereal. a cereal killer.
What the difference between you and a calendar? a calendar has dates.
What kind of emotions do noses feel? Nostralgia. Why did the dog cross the road? To get to the "barking" lot!
Whens the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty
What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller.
What washes up on very small beaches? Microwaves!
What event do spiders love to attend?
Webbings.
Did you hear about the sick juggler? They say he couldnt stop throwing up!
Why did the daddy rabbit go to the barber?
He had a lot of little hares.
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? "Where's Popcorn?"
Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why.
'I've lost five dollars,' sobbed Johnny.
'Don't worry,' said his dad kindly.'
Here's five more for you,' At this Johnny howled louder than ever.
'Now what is it ?' asked his dad.
'I wish I'd said I'd lost ten dollars!'
Did you hear about the circus fire? Yeah, it was in'tents'.
Did you hear about the calendar thief? He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered
Q: How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
By the footprints in the butter!
What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
What did the pink panther say when he stepped on the ant? A. deadant deadant deadant deadant.
Did you hear about the paper boy? He blew away
What can you serve but never eat? A volleyball.
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware? Idaho... Alaska!
Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Why is a baseball team similar to a muffin? They both depend on the batter.
Q: What did one tooth say to the other tooth?
A: Thar's gold in them fills!
What do you call leftover aliens? Extra Terrestrials.
Why did Goofy put a clock under his desk? Because he wanted to work over-time!
Did you hear about the ghost comedian? He was booed off stage.
Why did Tony go out with a prune? Because he couldn't find a date!
Where do bulls get their messages? On a bull-etin board.
Why did Harry Potter throw away all his old potions?
They were past their hexpiration date!
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock
Go to BabaMail
