This is where you find the clean funny jokes kids of all ages can enjoy.

I went to the doctor with hearing problems. He said, "Can you describe the symptoms?"

I said, “Homer’s the big dude and Marge has blue hair...”
Question: What is the oldest animal?
Answer: The Zebra, it's still in black and white!
.
The opposite of isolate is...
yousoearly.
What do you call a magician that lost his magic?
Ian.
Did you know vampires aren’t real?
Unless you Count Dracula.
What is considered the tallest building in the world?
The library, because it has so many stories.
Why is justice best served cold?
Because if it were warm, it would be justwater.
Batman walks into a superhero-only pool, he is quickly stopped by a guard, the guard points to a sign that says
"No swimming without supervision."
Why did the chicken cross the road? It was playing crossy road.
19 and 20 got into a fight.
21.
I’m sick of martial arts.
I have kung flu.
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? SUPPLIES!
Choose any number between 2 and 7. Multiply by 4 and add 3. Now reverse the digits and close your eyes.
Dark, isn’t it?
Knock Knock
Who's There?
I eat grape.
I eat grape who?
You eat grey poo!
Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday?
Because people kept toasting him!
Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why.
'I've lost five dollars,' sobbed Johnny.
'Don't worry,' said his dad kindly.'
Here's five more for you,' At this Johnny howled louder than ever.
'Now what is it ?' asked his dad.
'I wish I'd said I'd lost ten dollars!'
Little Johnny asked his father, "Dad, can you write in the dark?"
His father said, "I think so. What do you want me to write?"
Little Johnny replied, "Oh, just sign this report card for me..."
Did you hear the score in the game between the ocean and the beach? It’s tide.
What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurtie.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
What vehicle has 4 wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
How does a suit put his child into bed?

He tux him in.
What is large and rocky at the bottom, small and snowy at the top and has ears?
Give up? A mountain.

Yeah but what about the ears?

You never heard of mountaineers?
A bunch of vampire hunters needed to talk
So they scheduled a stakeholders meeting.
What did the father say whilst teaching his kid to tie his shoelaces?
Knot bad
What’s a good name for a detective?
Mr. E
What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?
I'm a cashew!