What’s in the middle of a jellyfish?
A jelly button.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
Where do fish sleep?
On a seabed, and sometimes they vacation at the river bed.
What do you call a jellyfish on a plane?
A flightoplankton.
Who does a fish call when his piano breaks?
The piano tuna!
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
Whale, whale, whale…
If it isn’t a pod.
My wife got stung by a jellyfish and said, “Quick, pee on it!” So I peed on it and said…
“That’s for stinging my wife!”
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?
A seahorse.
If you can think of a better fish pun, let minnow.
What is a pirate’s favorite’s fish?
A pirates favorite fish is a swordfish!
Why do fish swim in schools?
Because they can't walk.
What are the fastest fish in the river? The motor-pike with a side-carp!
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What do jellyfish and a girl after prom night have in common?
They can't be deboned.
What fish perform at the circus?
Clown fish!
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fishually impaired.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!
Which fish is the most famous? The starfish.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put the fish in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner.
What did the fish say to the other fish? Pucker-fish!
Who granted the fish’s wish?
The fairy cod mother!
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
What did one fish say to the other?
If you keep your mouth closed you will not get caught.
Where do fish go to watch movies?
At the dive-in.
What’s the easiest way to catch fish? Have someone throw it at you!
Why don’t fish play basketball?
Because they're afraid of the net.
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
What kind of whale can fly?
A Pilot whale.
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
What is the funniest fish in the sea?
A clownfish.
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?
A monkfish.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed!
Do you know where you take a sick squid?
To the doctopus.
What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
Why do you bring fish to a party?
You bring fish to a party because they go well with chips!
What kind of fish do you find in a bird cage?
A perch!
How does an octopus go to war?
Well armed.
Where do fish save their money?
In the river bank.
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
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