Why did the koala get fired from his job?
Because he would only do the bear minimum.
What is a koala’s favorite pop singer? Koala Rae Jepsen. Her most popular song? “Koala Me Maybe”.
Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? He was underkoalafied. How did he fix this? By going back to koalage.
Where are koalas taken when they die? To an ancient bearial site.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
What happens when a koala drinks too much alcohol? He gets a bear gut.
Why don’t koalas like fast food? Because it’s too hard for them to catch.
What do you call a Koala that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
Why isn't the the koala a real bear? He doesn't have the right koalifications.
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
Did you hear about the koala bear in the church choir? Yeah, they say he sings bearitone.
What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What did the koala write in his Valentine’s Day card to his girlfriend? “I love you-calyptus”.
Why did the bear quit his second job?
Because he needed some koalaty time with his family.
Was the koala able to complete the grueling 26-mile marathon? Bearly.
A star athlete in Koalaville got kicked off the Olympic team for cheating. Unfortunately, he was diskoalafied.
What do you call a koala with a negative attitude? The bearer of bad news.
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
What do koalas use when they’re doing yard work? A wheelbearow.
What’s the scariest koala movie ever made? The Bear Witch Project.
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
Why do you never see koalas wearing shoes? Because they love going bearfoot.
What happened when the koala tripped and fell in a crowded restaurant? He got embearassed.
How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
When does a Koala go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
What’s small, furry and slightly purple? A koala holding its breath!
Before the Koalaville basketball team can play for the national championship, they have to make it through the koalafying rounds.
Why did the Koala cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
How do you know when a baby koala bear is happy? You’ll see them jump for joey!
What is a koala bear’s favorite mixed drink? A pina koala.
What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing? “Joey to the World”, of course!
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
Besides eucalyptus leaves, what is a koala bear’s favorite vegetable? Koalaflower.
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? “Aussie dead people.”
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
There once was a koala who could run at a speed of more than 800 miles per hour. He was the first koala to break the sound bearier.
Why was the koala scientist so well-respected by his peers? He was known for conducting excellent koalatative research.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
What do koalas do when they’re facing a tough situation? They grin and bear it.
What happened when the bear applied at the movie theater?
He was told he was not koala-fied.
What is a koala’s favorite Christmas carol? Deck the halls with boughs of holly, koala-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!!!
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
What is a koala’s favorite soft drink? Koka-Koala, of course!
What would you call a dream where a koala bear is eating you? A bite-mare.
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