What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
Farmers were in an all out war to decide which vegetable they would plant
It was resolved with a Peas Treaty.
What did the conifer say when he finally got alone with his crush? It’s just yew and me, baby.
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
The ocean cut off all ties with the river, because the river turned out to be too shallow.
Avoid pier pressure.
Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
A: Leaf me alone
When a mountain falls sick, it tells the doctor that he's feeling really very, very hill.
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
What did the tornado say to the washing machine?
Want to go for a spin?
How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?
A little shaken
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
Did you hear about the cloud who became king? He rained for years.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
I mist say, this is a pretty bad joke, but it haze potential.
I needed to add some grass seeds to my lawn. The only thing I could find to keep the seeds out of my flower bed was some ceramic bunnies my wife had, so I used those as a barrier.
Please don't make fun of my re-seeding hare line.
Why should you never tell jokes about radon, cobalt and yttrium? They are just too CoRnY.
How one snowman greets the other one?
Ice to meet you.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
Q; What’s the difference between origami and grandpa passing wind?
A: One is the art of the fold, the other, the fart of the old.
My friend couldn’t pay his water bill anymore.
I sent him a Get Well Soon card.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
Q: How is hurricane season like Christmas?
A: At some point, there’s going to be a tree inside your house.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
Sea you at the beach.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What do you call a negative fog?
A pessimist.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
Why is grass so dangerous? Because it is full of blades!
What is the most depressed river in Southern Europe? The Crimea River.
My father cooked us mushrooms. Later he asked "Having fun guys"?
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
Why didn’t the flower get a second date?
He was garden variety.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What did the sea say to the river? You can run but you can't tide.
Why did the dad prefer driving in the rain?
Things ran more fluidly.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
Water you doing?
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
How do you learn more about spiders that live in the rainforest? Check out their web site!
A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire
He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.
Where do naughty rainbows go?
Prism
I need to apologize to my fellow Californians for all the recent forest fires.
Apparently I'm the only one that could've prevented them
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