Q: What is a wind turbine’s favorite musical group?
A: Air Supply
What do you call it when you get a month’s worth of rain at once?
England.
What does a tornado wear under his clothes? Thunderwear!
What do you say when the beach asks you to walk on it?
Shore
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Where do doubtful Egyptians get their water from?
Denial River.
If there was to be a beauty contest bringing together all the beautiful mushrooms on the face of the earth, the porta-bella mushroom would carry the day.
My dad's nickname is lightning.
That way I can tell my friends I've been struck by lightning multiple times.
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out.
When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..
It's a current affair.
Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
What did the flower say when he saw his date?
I think you’re dandy, and I’m not lion!
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
A man went to buy long underwear cause the weather was getting cold. The cashier asked " How long would you like them"
"From march to September", said the man.
What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?
Van Hailin’.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
Why did the boy soon stop trying to grab the mountain fog? Because he always mist.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
Don't get tide-up in sorrows, you will only cry a river.
We got the news of a coming flood today. The news was leaked.
I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday
They say it's because I took a day off.
They figured it was the best way to break the ice.
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
I'll open fire on anyone who says video games make children violent!
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
There's a criminal who lives at the end of the rainbow, who likes to trick people. He is called the lepre-con artist.
Who does their best work when they're under the weather?
Meteorologists.
In what state is the Amazon River? It is in the liquid state.
Why did the man driving a train get struck by lightning?
He was a good conductor.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
Why do people like storm watching so much?
The lightning is quite striking!
What types of mushrooms do vegetarians avoid? Oyster mushrooms.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
What is a flower’s favorite Journey song?
Don’t stop be-leafing.
Did you hear about the cloud who became king? He rained for years.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
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