I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
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