What type of ice cream do fish like to eat?
Shark-o-late!
Why did the shark cross the great barrier reef?
To get to the other tide.
I was at the beach today when I saw a man in the sea yelling “Help, shark! Help!”
I just laughed. I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
The last ten times I’ve been to a fancy dress party, I’ve gone as a shark.
The joke’s wearing fin.
How does a shark greet a fish?
Pleased to eat you.
What do you call a shark that can’t stop singing “U Cant Touch This?”
An M.C. Hammerhead.
What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark?
An animal that talks your head off.
I’ve just read that according to statistics, donkeys kill more people every year than sharks.
I better watch my ass.
How did the shark plead in its murder trial?
Not gill-ty.
Where do sharks go on vacation?
Fin-land.
What’s a shark’s favorite movie?
The Shaw-shark Redemption.
What’s the great white shark’s favorite candy?
Jaw-Breakers.
Calling my new dog “Shark” was a mistake.
I’ve been banned from all my local beaches.
There’s a lot of debate over where the best place to punch a shark is.
Personally, I think it’s the sea.
Did you hear about the aquarium owner?
His shark was worse than his pike.
What do yuppie sharks like to drink?
Jaw-va.
I had a nightmare about being attacked by a shark.
When I woke up I realized it was just a bream.
What's a shark's favorite hobby?
Anything he can sink his teeth into.
Where are sharks from?
Finland!
What did the shark say to the whale?
What are you blubbering about?
How did the shark do on his test?
Fin-Tastic!
What do you call a rubber bumper on a yacht?
A shark absorber.
What kind of shark is always gambling?
A card shark.
I just saw a huge killer fish singing and playing guitar in the city center.
I think it must be a busking shark.
Why did the shark spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny.
Who gives sharks presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws.
What’s a shark’s favorite bible story?
Noah’s Shark.
What was the shark’s favorite Tim Burton film?
Edward Scissorfins.
What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show?
Shark Trek.
What do sharks order at McDonalds?
A quarter flounder.
What’s a shark favorite substance?
Reefer.
How did the hammerhead do on his test?
He nailed it.
What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish?
A loan shark
What happened to the shark who swallowed a bunch of keys?
It got lockjaw.
What is a sharks favorite kinda sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
What kind of sharks make good carpenters?
Hammerheads.
I thought swimming with the dolphins was expensive, but swimming with the sharks cost me an arm and a leg!
What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
You get as far away as possible.
What do you get when you cross a shark with a snowman?
Frostbite.
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