What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
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