What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
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