Have you ever seen a fish cry?
No, but I’ve seen a whale blubber.
How do whales make a decision?
They flipper coin.
Why was the Whale bank heist so successful?
Because it was a whale orca-strated plan
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
What’s a whale’s favorite meal?
Fish and ships.
What do you call a group of whale musicians?
An orca-stra.
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
What do polite whales always say?
You’re whale-come.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
The killer whale planned its attack on the seals for weeks.
It was very carefully orca-strated.
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
What did one beached whale say to the other beached whale?
Long time no sea.
What’s a whale’s favorite movie?
The Humpback Of Notre Dame.
Why can’t you screw with whales?
because they hump back.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do whales like to chew?
Blubber gum.
Which type of whale can fly?
Pilot whales.
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
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