Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...
Once upon a time there was this lobster...
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
Have you seen my lobster?
I'm worried he might by a lost claws.
What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?
Ones a crustaecian and the other is a crushed Asian.
here do lobsters go to borrow money? The prawn broker.
I met this really beautiful crustacean, but I lobst her number.
How does a lobster answer the phone?
"Shello?"
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea-weed.
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
What’s the difference between a greyhound station and a lobster with a boob job?
One’s a crusty bus-station, the other’s a busty crustacean.
What do you call a lobster with a Christmas hat?
Santa Claws
What do you get if you cross a lobster with a telephone?
A snappy talk.
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
My lobster's name is:
Claude
What do you call a lobster that's afraid of tight spaces?
Claw-strophobic
The lobster is one shell of an animal.
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
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