Enjoy the funniest news headline one liners, most of which come from real newspapers!

Goldfish Is Saved From Drowning
Stolen Painting Found By Tree
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Lawmen From Mexico Barbecue Guests
Juvenile Court Tries Shooting Defendant
British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe out Literacy.
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges.
Cold Wave Linked To Temperatures
Foul Play Suspected In Death Of Man Found Handless, Bound And Hanged
Blind Woman Gets New Kidney From Dad She Hasn't Seen In Years
Hypochondriacs aren't OK
Miners Refuse to Work after Death.
CRIME: Sheriff Asks For 13.7% Increase
Hospitals Are Sued By 7 Foot Doctors
Milk Drinkers are Turning to Powder.
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group.
“I Thought He Was Going to Kill Me”: One Woman’s Harrowing Misunderstanding of How Haircuts Work
Grandmother Of Eight Makes Hole In One
Kicking Baby Considered Healthy
Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In Ten Years
Republicans Turned Off By Size Of Obama’s Package
Man is Fatally Slain.
Circumcision Now Seen As Pointless.
Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed The Needy
Bodies in garden are a plant says wife
Federal Agents raid gun shop, find weapons
Gas rig men grilled by villagers - The Oxford Times
Two Sisters Reunite after Eighteen Years at Checkout Counter.