Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
A crocodile tried to copy a rooster to wake his friends one morning, he went croc-a-doodle do.
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
I like you, you croc my world.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
It was a crocadoodledoo.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
What is a crocodiles favourite dessert?
Brandy snaps.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
Some people like to play croc-quet.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
If you need to share out your to-do list, just be a dele-gator.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
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