If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
Did you hear about the girl who put gorilla glue in her hair?
Her stupidity knew no bonds
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
What did the Gorilla say when he saw there was a sale happening?
Ooh! OOh! OOOh!!!!
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
How did the gorilla know she was poorly? She had a belly ape.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
Why did the Gorilla fail its exam? He didn't have the ape-titude.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
Go to BabaMail
