Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Where do gorillas go to after work?
The monkey bars.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
How did the gorilla know she was poorly? She had a belly ape.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Q. What haapens if a gorilla sits on your piano?
A. You get a flat note.
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.