Who’s the patron saint of poverty?
St. Nickeless.
What’s a salesman’s favorite Scripture passage?
The Great Commission
Need an ark?
I noah guy.
Which servant of God was the worst lawbreaker in the Bible?
Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
How does Moses make his coffee?
Hebrews it.
Where was Solomon’s temple located?
On the side of his head.
Who’s the arch-enemy of the Gsus chord?
The Dmin chord.
Why wouldn’t the Pharaoh let the Hebrews go?
He was in ‘de Nile.
What’s the difference between Jesus and pizza?
Jesus can’t be topped.
What is a dentist’s favorite hymn?
Crown Him with Many Crowns
What’s a missionary’s favorite kind of car?
A convertible.
At what time of day was Adam created?
A little before Eve.
What kind of egg did the bad chicken lay? A deviled egg!
Why did some cardinals get their feathers ruffled?
The Pope gave away the church’s nest egg to the poor.
Why did the hawk sit on the church’s steeple?
It was a bird of pray.
Why did Noah have to punish the chickens on the Ark?
They were using fowl language.
Where was Solomon’s temple located?
On the side of his head.
What’s the best way to settle church disputes?
With canons.
How long did Cain hate his brother?
As long as he was Abel.
Why is Christmas the cheesiest holiday? Baby cheeses. (Baby Jesus)
What’s a salesman’s favorite Scripture passage?
The Great Commission
Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
Samson. He brought the house down.
What car make did the Apostles drive?
Honda… because the apostles were all in one Accord.
Why did Samson try to avoid arguing with Delilah?
He didn’t want to split hairs.
What is a dentist’s favorite hymn?
Crown Him with Many Crowns
Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?
In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
Who’s the arch-enemy of the Gsus chord?
The Dmin chord.
Which Old Testament prophet took forever to make a point?
“I say… uhhh…” (say it out loud)
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