I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
I used to have a scuba diving business
But it went under.
What is the favorite sport for the young bass? It is the bass get ball.
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
What did they give former Flyers left-winger Brian when he successfully
bulked up? Massive Propps.
Why did the barber win the race?
He took a short cut!
Football pitches are almost always so wet. This is because soccer players dribble a lot.
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
The density of this concrete leads me to believe one thing: it is a hard court.
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
The anti-vax basketball team lost every game this season
Apparently they never take any shots.
I know an untidy guy who’s excellent at playing soccer.
What a Messi guy.
Why was the basketball court so slippery?
Because all the players were dribbling on it.
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
What does a bowler and a Thanksgiving guest have in common?
They both want a Turkey.
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
The injured player wanted to congratulate the winner, but he couldn’t walkover to the other side of the court.
What do you get if you cross a ski instructor and a vampire?
Frostbite.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
What do golf and se* have in common?
They’re two things you can enjoy even if you’re bad at both of them.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
What did the swimming pool say to the skimmer?
Leaf me alone!
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
Did you know Karl Marx's sister invented the starting pistol?
Her name was Onya Marx.
My girlfriend left me because all I do is talk about football.
I'm so sad, we were together for 3 seasons.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
A team may be talented, but there is no substitute to this, no train no gain!
Who wrote the fantasy novel How To Be A Better Baseball Player?
Ben Schwarmer.
What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score?
SlamDrunk!
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
The target in soccer is to kick it where it counts.
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
Deep sea diving is so dangerous.
I just can’t fathom it.
Why did the vegetarian stop running cross country?
He did not like the meets.
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
What is the difference between a ball hog and time?
Time passes.
How did the blind guy from Denver enjoy a bit of apres skiing on Lookout Mountain during the last white-out?
He brought along his skiing-eye dog.
I know my shot was in. But I won’t argue, because I’m not up for the challenge.
What does a mom of a football fan hate the most?
A messi room.
Why wasn’t the little pumpkin allowed to swim?
There was no life gourd on duty!
What do you call a horse that is good at football?
Neighhhhh-mar.
Federer is such a legend that they named the Roger’s Cup, and Fed Cup after him.
Case in punt