Did you hear about the Irishman that drank 100 liters of stout in just 30 minutes?
They’re calling it a Guinness World Record.
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
Did you hear about the Irish potato that immigrated?
He became a French fry.
What do you call a fake Irish stone?
A shamrock.
Why don’t leprechauns run?
They’d rather jig than jog.
I am happy that the arrangements for St Patrick's day are going great. The large bottles of green soda look pitcher-perfect.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
Irish I had better jokes.
It ain’t over till it’s clover.
A trip to Ireland always lifts my spirits.
Irish food is legen-dairy.
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
Just look, it’s the Trifle Tower
What is it called when two Irish couples go out on a date?
Dublin.
How does every Irish joke start?
By looking over your shoulder.
Ireland is a little lamb-boyant.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaved clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.
In Ireland, when the cows are in the road it’s udder chaos.
Be-leaf me, you look great in green.
You’re my lucky charm.
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
Ireland is pitcher perfect.
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
How can you tell if you’ve told a really funny Irish joke?
People will be Dublin over with laughter!
St. Patrick’s is all about the pursuit of hoppiness!
What do you call a bulletproof Irish man?
Rick O’Shay.
When does a leprechaun cross the road?
Just like everyone - when it's green!
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
In Ireland, I call the shots.
Don’t worry, Moher pictures are coming.
This weekend, I will watch a new Irish movie based on a marathon runner who only ate potatoes. It is called Starch Trek.
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
Remember, Irish puns on St. Patrick's Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all.
What kind of person would sell someone a sham-rock?
A lepre-con!
A trip to Ireland is quite a cliffhanger.
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
You have me greening from ear to ear.
Dublin over in laughter.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
How can Irish people tell when it’s summer?
The rain gets warmer.
March 17 is near, and I am so excited about it. The clover it gets, the more excited I become.
I love when you coddle me.
Did you hear Ireland is the fastest-growing country in Europe?
Its population is always Dublin.
Do you be-leaf in magic?
My grandma is 80% Irish.
People call her Iris.
You’re the cutest clover in the patch.
Jameson on St. Patrick’s Day? It’s worth a shot.