Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
What do you call a bulletproof Irish man?
Rick O’Shay.
Just look, it’s the Trifle Tower
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
Dublin over in laughter.
Irish potatoes are spud-tacular.
In Ireland, I call the shots.
Be-leaf me, you look great in green.
I’m feelin’ green.
Did you hear Ireland is the fastest-growing country in Europe?
Its population is always Dublin.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
This weekend, I will watch a new Irish movie based on a marathon runner who only ate potatoes. It is called Starch Trek.
What do you say if you lose a game on St. Patrick's Day?
Game clover.
Why did the two Irish men fight amongst themselves?
They can’t find any other worthy opponents.
I’m a small Irish creature who has been diagnosed with a serious sickness. It’s Leprechronic.
Did you hear about the Irishman that drank 100 liters of stout in just 30 minutes?
They’re calling it a Guinness World Record.
Ireland is pitcher perfect.
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
You have me greening from ear to ear.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
I’m ready to shamrock and roll.
Ireland is a little lamb-boyant.
In Ireland, when the cows are in the road it’s udder chaos.
I love when you coddle me.
How can Irish people tell when it’s summer?
The rain gets warmer.
Do you be-leaf in magic?
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
What do ghosts drink on St Patricks Day?
BOOs.
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
Don’t worry, Moher pictures are coming.
In Ireland, they really like to ham it up.
St. Patrick’s is all about the pursuit of hoppiness!
A trip to Ireland always lifts my spirits.
Remember, Irish puns on St. Patrick's Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all.
What do you call a big Irish spider?
A Paddy long legs.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
What kind of person would sell someone a sham-rock?
A lepre-con!
When does a leprechaun cross the road?
Just like everyone - when it's green!
Why don’t leprechauns run?
They’d rather jig than jog.
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
March 17 is near, and I am so excited about it. The clover it gets, the more excited I become.
Irish food is legen-dairy.
Did you hear about the Irish potato that immigrated?
He became a French fry.
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
You’re my lucky charm.
Jameson on St. Patrick’s Day? It’s worth a shot.
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.