Oh, you're here! We were worried some fowl play has befallen you. We couldn't possibly gobble these hilarious Turkey Puns without you.

What do you call an turkey with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
Why did the cranberries turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing!
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
When does a turkey go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself!
What kind of turkey grows on a tree? Poultry.
What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
Who dosent eat on Thanksgiving? A turkey because it is always stuffed.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
What does Miley Cyrus eat at Christmas? Twerk-ey!
Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off!
What kind of key has no lock?
A turkey.
Why did Jesus ask Judas to crave the turkey?
Beause he knows he likes stabbing others in the back.
What do you call it when a family passes down a turkey recipe?
Copy and basting.
What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing! Wing!
Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected it of fowl play

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? The turKEY
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? "If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!"
Dear Turkey, don't worry... they only love us for our breasts too. Sincerely, all women.
What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist!
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
Who is not hungry at Thanksgiving? The turkey because he's already stuffed!
Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk? To hatchet.
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"? Because they never learned good table manners!
What does a English turkey say to another English turkey on Thanksgiving morning? "Excuse Me... ahem... To be or not to be roasted, that is the question!"
The turkey says, "gobble, gobble."
I appreciate it when food comes with instructions.