We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
What is a skeleton’s favorite TV show?
Bone-anza!
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
What’s a werewolve's favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas!
Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
What is a zombie’s favorite shampoo?
Head & Shoulders.
What is a favorite game for ghouls?
Chase!
I asked a vampire if I could borrow some money. He told me he needed to go to the blood bank.
How did the archeologists know the skeletons were real?
They were bone-afide.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
What is a werewolf’s favorite tree?
A lu-pine.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
Why didn’t the lady skeleton wear a bikini?
Because she was big boned.
Big Foot has been spotted throwing tantrums and talking back to his parents.
No wonder they call him the Sassquatch.
What is a wolf’s favorite time of the year?
The howl-o-days.
What do you call a bodybuilder skeleton?
A musculoskeleton.
How do you stop a werewolf attacking you?
Throw a stick and shout “Fetch.”
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What do you call a silly werewolf in Australia ?
A dingo-ling
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skelebin.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What do you call a skeleton who goes out in the snow?
A numb-skull.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
Many people think that the Abominable Snowman doesn't exist...
Yeti does.
What does one vampire say to another before bed?
- I hope you have a fang-tastic day!
What do you call it when the Bigfoot in charge makes pasta for all the others?
Alpha Yeti Spaghetti!
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
How did the skeletons make s’mores when they went camping?
They made them on the bone-fire.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
Did you hear about the vampire who only had one fang?
He just had to grin and bare it.
What kind of pet fish did the skeleton have?
A bonefish.
Dracula always read the best selling local newspaper because he heard that it had a good circulation.
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
Buffet the Vampire Slayer!
A vampire broke up with his girlfriend when she had a blood test. He told her she wasn't his type.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
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