I drank alot of alcohol at the airport last night.
I now have a terminal hangover.
What do you call a paper plane that doesn't fly ?
Stationary.
Flying for long distances is very Boeing at times
I met my wife at a travel agency
She was looking for a vacation and I was her last resort.
My dad used to be an airline pilot, but he decided to retire because it got too Boe-ing.
Checking in for a flight, I was asked, "Window or Aisle?"
I said, "Window or you'll do what?
Volcanoes are rude! They are always int-erupt-ing.
I've just arrived in Bulgaria. How is it? Sofia, so good.
I had an instant connection with someone in South Korea. I think they're my Seoul mate.
I would tell a time travel joke,
but you didn't like it.
I have always had acrophobia, but the plane flight brought it to a new height.
This palace is a breath of fresh heir!
Will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?
I just can't see them taking off.
If you travel to the future and get decapitated
You'd be ahead of your time
Airlines have nowadays become so cash strapped that they charge you for everything including emotional baggage.
One of my friends got lost while touring Tokyo. Turns out it was all Ja-plan.
Why did the volcano say to the mountain? I lava you
If you are going to sleep, I wish you suite dreams.
How do rabbits travel?
On hareplanes!
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
I was arrested at the airport. Just because I was greeting my cousin Jack!
All that I said was "Hi Jack", but very loud.
Took a flight, and my luggage got torn to pieces....
My lawyer said I don't have much of a case.
It's lunchtime and the newcomer at my workplace is on a plane to India
Turns out, someone told him that the nearby Delhi has the best sandwiches
My grandad was responsible for 28 downed german planes in WW2.
Still to this day, he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
A security guard at an airport informs the pilot of a man trying to sneak contraband onto an airplane.
The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."
You never realize how time flies when you are not wearing a watch on a plane.
I never get tide down to one place when there's so much to sea.
Why do the propellers of a plane go around and around?
To keep the pilot cool because if they stopped, man would he sweat
Where do sharks go when they want a vacation? Finland
I just flew on a plane with an all female flight crew.
It was an....unmanned aircraft.
The company is planning to make a new series to show people how to fly an aeroplane. They are now filming the pilot.
What do we call an airplane that cannot take off? It is called an error plane.
The best place to hide something is at an airport
You'd be hiding something in plane site.
My dad thought Cuba would be boring. He's now Havana a really great time.
I hate getting tide down in one place. So let's take an ad-van-ture.
On a recent flight, my friend asked me, "If the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?
I said, "No, we will still be friends."
I think there'll be a ferry-tale ending to this trip.
Did you hear about the vultures who went to check-in for their flight at the airport? When the check-in agent asked them if they had any luggage to check, they replied, no we just have carri-on.
A photon turns up at check-in for a flight with no baggage. The check-in agent says "Traveling light?". He says "Yes, I am".
Pilots would be very hard to beat in a competition, they are always ready for a-rrival.
I've got this awful disease where I can't stop telling airport puns.
I think it may be terminal
How do you reply to an email about someone freaking out at the Los Angeles International Airport?
Re:LAX
Koi fish always travel in a groups of four
Because the predator will go after the D koi
Why was the ocean angry? Because the ocean didn't wave back.
I used to be addicted to time travel,
but that's all in the past now.
Flight attendants fly with a very meaningful motto: always look on the flight side of life.
Prague is my number one choice for a dream destination...
Dying to Czech it out
When you cross a magician and an airplane, the result is a flying sorcerer.
We've been driving all day, I need a brake.
My suitcase started crying when I picked it up. I was carrying emotional baggage.
If a baby is born on a plane, i guess you could call it... airborn.