Took a flight, and my luggage got torn to pieces....
My lawyer said I don't have much of a case.
Windmills? I’m a huge fan!
I've got this awful disease where I can't stop telling airport puns.
I think it may be terminal
What travels all over the world, but stays in a corner?
A stamp
If you travel to the future and get decapitated
You'd be ahead of your time
I wouldn't say that flying is my favorite way to travel...
But it's up there.
What sound does a bouncy plane make?
Boeing.
Prague is my number one choice for a dream destination...
Dying to Czech it out
Flying for long distances is very Boeing at times
Checking in for a flight, I was asked, "Window or Aisle?"
I said, "Window or you'll do what?
My grandad was responsible for 28 downed german planes in WW2.
Still to this day, he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
Cows that travel alone?
Never herd of them!
In spite of all restrictions because of Covid, diplomats are allowed to travel freely across countries.
Because they have immunity.
I have always had acrophobia, but the plane flight brought it to a new height.
Every single person on my flight was reading at the same time.
The plane was fully booked.
It's lunchtime and the newcomer at my workplace is on a plane to India
Turns out, someone told him that the nearby Delhi has the best sandwiches
I've just arrived in Bulgaria. How is it? Sofia, so good.
I was waiting at the airport baggage carousel, and noticed that everyone else had a better bag than me.
It was ....the worst case scenario.
Why did the volcano say to the mountain? I lava you
The airline lost my luggage, and so I sued them. Unfortunately, I lost the case.
Did you hear about the vultures who went to check-in for their flight at the airport? When the check-in agent asked them if they had any luggage to check, they replied, no we just have carri-on.
What kind of chocolate do they sell at the airport?
Plane chocolate
Flight attendants fly with a very meaningful motto: always look on the flight side of life.
I think there'll be a ferry-tale ending to this trip.
I hate getting tide down in one place. So let's take an ad-van-ture.
What happened when a man practiced archery near some stationary planes? They ended up very arrow-dynamic.
When you cross a plane and a snake, you will end up with a Boeing Constrictor.
A ship wanted to travel from the Pacific to the Arctic
But it just couldn't get its Bering Strait.
The company is planning to make a new series to show people how to fly an aeroplane. They are now filming the pilot.
Koi fish always travel in a groups of four
Because the predator will go after the D koi
One of my friends got lost while touring Tokyo. Turns out it was all Ja-plan.
Los Angeles International Airport should sell their own brand of laxatives called LAXatives.
My dad used to be an airline pilot, but he decided to retire because it got too Boe-ing.
The pilot was lucky. He always had work. Whenever he made an application, it was almost certain that he would land a job.
I am lucky to live in an airport, but whenever the guard comes out at night, Heathrows me out.
Why was the ocean angry? Because the ocean didn't wave back.
I was so tired. I needed a sea-esta on the beach.
My little brother had to stay with our parents when we went to Italy. I was free to Rome.
As soon as the plane was invented, things started looking up.
A security guard at an airport informs the pilot of a man trying to sneak contraband onto an airplane.
The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."
Will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?
I just can't see them taking off.
What do we call an airplane that cannot take off? It is called an error plane.
Why do the propellers of a plane go around and around?
To keep the pilot cool because if they stopped, man would he sweat
How do rabbits travel?
On hareplanes!
When you cross a magician and an airplane, the result is a flying sorcerer.
A photon turns up at check-in for a flight with no baggage. The check-in agent says "Traveling light?". He says "Yes, I am".
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
I used to be addicted to time travel,
but that's all in the past now.
People who fall sick at the airport possibly end up with terminal illness.
Volcanoes are rude! They are always int-erupt-ing.
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