Two trucks – one carrying strawberries and one carrying sugar – crashed. Drivers didn’t stop, and now the jam is getting thicker.
Car puns are really tiring
Honda is oldest car make in the world. It was mentioned in the bible!
"And the apostles were all in Accord"
What did the bus say to the frog? Hop on.
Why did the bus driver laugh? He was having a 'wheely' good time!
Have you heard about Amazon’s plan to make intercontinental shipments using electric submarine drones?
They’re projecting a large increase in e-fish-in-sea.
Why did the bus driver go to jail? He was 'wheely' breaking the law!
It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25. You know why?
Inflation.
Where do bus drivers eat their lunches? In a traffic jam.
Which Hollywood actor can tell his car's odometer reading without looking at it?
Miles Teller
How does a flower propel a bicycle?
It petals!
Why did the submarine driver lose his job
Old, racist tweets resurfaced
What is the car dealership in Star Wars called?
The Mazda-lorian
Why do you only drive automatics?
‘I could never find a manual.’
What do you call a murder where the perp runs away on a bicycle?
A drive bike shooting
I'm gonna quit my job on a submarine
I'm under a lot of pressure
My Dad drove a truck for 32 years.
He was terrible with directions.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was 2-tired.
How to spot the best mechanic?
The brightest bulb.
Why did the submarines feelings get hurt?
Because they keep calling it a dipship
What do you call unwanted revealing comments about a movie?
Spoilers.
My race time today was much better than yesterday. I was in a whole different gear.
My bike chain got rusted. Then my whole bicycle broke down. It was a chain reaction.
What happens when you run in front of a bus?
You get tired.
What happens when you run behind a bus?
You get exhausted.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus
BREAKING NEWS: Vietnam accidentally sank its own submarine killing all 350 on board
Whoops, wrong sub.
What did the Wife say to the Husband?
You are exhausting!
I tried driving a truck with a trailer that was attached without using the proper equipment.
It went off without a hitch.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
What did the girl say before making a big decision?
‘Do not pressure me.’
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck!
Why should you be cautious of a Finnish submarine captain?
He’ll sink ye.
Every morning when I leave home, a bike comes from somewhere and runs me over. It’s a vicious cycle.
How do you sink a submarine full of fools?
You knock on the door.
What color are military submarines?
Deep navy
Unbelievably there was yet another truck crash, this time it was carrying Vicks VapoRub. There was no congestion for the rest of the day.
We get fed up of long car journeys...
...meanwhile, truck drivers get fed ex.
How did cars protect themselves during the medieval age?
They would dig an M.O.T. around them.
What are police cars made of?
Copper
A slat spreading truck knocked me off my bike last year. I yelled “You idiot!” through gritted teeth.
I have a buddy who was recently hit by a bus, while promoting pedestrian safety.The surgeons had to replace all the joints in his left leg with metal.
I think it's safe to say he can appreciate the iron knee
Read a story about two people who stole cars driving into each other.
Must have been Bonnie and Collide
What did the car call his new band?
Back Seat Boys.
I did a good deed today by giving up my seat on the bus to an elderly lady...
How was I supposed to know she’d never driven a bus before?
I heard they’re remaking one of the Lord of the Rings movies, but everyone rides around on bicycles instead of horses.
They’re calling it The Two Tires
A car carrying bank robbers and a truck carrying cement collided yesterday. Police are now searching for hardened criminals.
My trucker friend was super excited about his new house. I asked him why, and he told me it had a really long haul way.
How to cars convince you?
By telling you that ‘you Audi-believe it.’
I tried to make a wooden submarine.
It didn't go down so well.
What did the teacher say when he could not get into his car?
‘Oh no, I have lost my Kias!’
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