Vehicle PunsJoke Generator

Jesus take the wheel! These car puns are too much to handle!

What do you call a big queue of trucks, making cheesy one-liners? A pick-up line.
A truck full of christmas trees have been stolen.
Police admit they are stumped.
I had a nasty crash with a truck carrying construction equipment the other day. It really hit me like a ton of bricks.
I'd steer clear of dating a dyslexic bus driver.
Sure, they may take you places, but there'll be mixed signals along the way.
Have you heard about the guys who stole a truck full of broccoli and cauliflower? They had to really floret to get away.
I was gonna make some car puns...
but I ran out of gas.
There’s a new movie out called “The Truck.” I’ve seen the trailer, it looks great.
In this day and age of technological breakthroughs, we surely can’t be far from a country song where a guy’s self-driving truck leaves him too.
I watched, horrified as two trucks carrying cheese crashed into each other. De brie was all over the road.
What are police cars made of?
Copper
My sister bet me that I couldn’t make a car out of spaghetti
You should have seen her face as I drove Pasta
What made the truck driver finally stop farting?
He ran out of gas.
What happens when a frogs car breaks down?
It has to be toad away.
There’s only one thing in the truck world that is bigger than a tow truck, and that’s a foot truck.
Tesla just announced they’ll be including a bottle of their new cologne now with every car sold
It’s called Elon’s Musk
My trucker friend was super excited about his new house. I asked him why, and he told me it had a really long haul way.
I was driving along the motorway one day when a truck in front of me shed its load of cabbage. Never slaw that coming.
What did the computer say to the other after a 16 hour car ride?
"That was a hard drive."
A man is wanted for stealing tires off of cop cars.
Police are working tirelessly to catch him.
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car?
Carlos.
There was this bald guy at the bus
He seemed really lightheaded
What do you call a bus full of smart people?
A Scholarship
Ice cream trucks are pretty hardy, but they will break down if they drive over the rocky road.
The doctor told me I probably won’t be able to walk again after getting into an accident with a newspaper delivery truck.
I was crushed by the news.
What is the preferred shampoo brand of truck drivers?
Lorry-el
Did you hear about the 2 Tow Truck drivers who wanted to elope?
They got hitched.
Honda is oldest car make in the world. It was mentioned in the bible!
"And the apostles were all in Accord"
I did a good deed today by giving up my seat on the bus to an elderly lady...
How was I supposed to know she’d never driven a bus before?
It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25. You know why?
Inflation.
It’s never great taking a truck driver to the cinema to watch a film. They only really like the trailers.
Read a story about two people who stole cars driving into each other.
Must have been Bonnie and Collide
A truck carrying Lego got into an accident on the motorway. No one knows what happened; the authorities are still trying to piece everything together.
A car carrying bank robbers and a truck carrying cement collided yesterday. Police are now searching for hardened criminals.
did you hear the one about the sheep in car wreck?
it was baaad.
A slat spreading truck knocked me off my bike last year. I yelled “You idiot!” through gritted teeth.
What do you call a row of 5 tow trucks?
A foot.
Today was a terrible day. First my ex got hit by a bus.
Then I lost my job as a driver.
I saw a sign on the bus the other day.
It said "please give this seat to the elderly."

So I ripped it out and took it home for my grandad
What is a con artist's truck towed with?
A pickup line
Anyone who is born in a car and dies outside is known as car born die oxide.
Car puns are really tiring
I told my boyfriend I'd missed the bus.
He asked me what I was trying to hit it with.
Driving behind an ambulance, I watched a box fall off the back. I checked inside and there was a foot in it, so I decided to call a toe truck.
Which Hollywood actor can tell his car's odometer reading without looking at it?
Miles Teller
Truck drivers have a great way of settling disputes – they only use their horns. It’s known as a fight to the deaf.
A truck carrying ladders crashed on the road. The cargo has spilled over, but police are taking steps to clear the area.
Another truck crashed further down the road; this one was carrying wigs. The police are combing the area.
Authorities have been trying to figure out how the Worcestershire sauce truck spilled...
But it's hard to say...
I’ve always been a trucker, but recently I applied for a job at Microsoft. I’ve heard they’re always looking for more drivers.
If a police officer pulls a U-Haul truck over...
did he just bust a move?
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