The face is a very punny thing... Welcome to our Face Puns!

My New Years resolution for next year will be to finally get that laser eye surgery I’ve always wanted
It’s my 2020 vision
I gave my wife a broken hair-dryer for her birthday
She wasn’t blown away.
I got sick when I lost one of my ear buds.
It was mono.
Condoms are like ear muffs.
They prevent a lot of noise.
Some people think it's okay to wear your mask over your mouth while not covering your nose.
They're mouthbreathers.
My wife made beef stew to clear my stuffed nose...
...bud I don'd dink it was strogonoff.
If Satan ever lost his hair...
There would be hell toupee.
Why was the man who hung tennis equipment from his ears arrested?
He was found guilty of racket-ear-ring
Eye drops are technically blinker fluid.
My father in law has had an ear infection for three weeks.
I had to double check that, it didn't sound right.
My little sister came to my room with a lighbulb in her mouth. I asked her "what in the world are you doing?"
She said "I'm having a light snack."
George Michael once damaged his ears while cleaning them...
Careless Swissper.
What kind of ears do trains have?
Engineers.
We all have that one vegan friend.... I said to mine,"Do you have to mention vegetables every time you open your mouth?"
She said, "Not neccecelery."
Thankfully evolution gave us ears a million years ago...
Now we finally get to use them to wear masks.
"What's with that fruit taped to your mouth?" the doctor asked. "Covid-19 prevention," the patient replied.
"You need a bandana, not a banana!"
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
"IT’S A LIEEEEE!!"
How many ears does Spok have?
Three. The left ear, the right ear and The Final Frontier.
I accidentally injured my girlfriend with a mouth organ.
I really didn't mean to harm Monica.
My doctor says I should get my ears cleaned every 12 months.
I think he means ear-ly.
Why is the nose in the middle of the face?
Because it's the scenter.
what does Stalin use to wipe his mouth?
A Soviette.
What is red and not good for your teeth?
A brick.
What do you call Bears without ears
B.
My friend keeps joking about the thing he has to wear to cover his mouth while he's exercising outside.
It's a running gag.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs!
My executive assistant has long hair.
I call him my mane man.
My son elbowed me in the mouth during a tickle fight
But that's ok. It was acci-dental.
I can't hear out of my ear...
It's really EAR-itating.
A man goes to the doctors and says " Doc, I'm having problems with my ears, I think I'm going deaf".
The Doc says " Can you tell me the symptoms?"

The man replies, " Well, Homer's the big fat bloke, and Marge has blue hair!"