If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97
So he rounded them up.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
What South American dance do cows like to do?
The Rump-a.
Why doesn’t Sweden export its cattle?
It wants to keep its Stockholm.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
The reason you will see all the cows lie down when it starts to rain is because they want to keep each
udder dry.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
What do you call an evil cow?
De-mooooon.
What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?
A cow walking backwards.
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?
Cowboom.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
Why is it a bad idea to give a cow marijuana?
The steaks are too high.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
India is a very peaceful country.
Because nobody has any beef over there.
Each time the cow escaped, the farmer would find him hiding in Moo York City.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
Why was the cow always exercising? To build up its moo-scles
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalfeinated.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Go to BabaMail
