Sloth Puns

Don't be lazy! Come laugh at our Sloth Puns!

A sloth walks in to a bar and waves to get the bartender’s attention, and says I’ll have...... a soda water.
The bartender replies “why the long paws?”
What do you call it when a sloth eats a second plate of food?
Slothy seconds
When does a sloth go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
What do you call a sloth that barely moves a muscle? A slow-off (show off).
My grandfather recently passed, and I discovered in his journal that he has an immense hatred for sloths, pandas, and koala bears. Looking back, it was obvious.
He was always going on about those darn tree-huggers.
I told my husband that the National Zoo's sloth bear gave birth but ate two of the three babies. He said "now she's guilty of 2 deadly sins: sloth and gluttony."
What do you get when you cross a cat and a sloth? A slow leopard.
What do sloths make when it snows? Slow Angels.
Why did the sloth get fired from his job? He would only do the BEAR minimum.
What do sloths throw in winter? Slowballs.
What do you get when you cross a sloth and a Scottish rock band? Slow Patrol.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
How do you apologize to a sloth? BEAR your heart and soul.
What is a three toed sloth's favorite kind of chip?
What do you call a sloth that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
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