What did the LEFT Stereo Speaker say to the RIGHT, as he was being taken away for repairs
AUDIOS!
What's the definition of a gentleman? One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!
What did the upright bass say to the nervous guitar?
“You’re too high strung, don’t fret.”
I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
What is a pianist’s favorite cheese ?
Mozzartrella.
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...
Badum chhh
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs.
What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?
Viola.
What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is happy when the case is closed.
I should change my name to Billy and get a job as a radio show presenter.
Then I can finally be a Billy-on-air.
What music are balloons scared of? Pop music
I wrote a song to memorialize the man killed when a piano fell down a mine shaft.
It's in A flat minor.
What do you call someone that plays Tenor and Alto saxophone?
Bisaxual.
What sound drum set from the junkyard makes?
Ba-dump-tss
I bought my daughter into a radio...
She's not very e-static about it.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
What's the difference between trumpet players and government bonds? Government bonds eventually mature and earn money.
The fisherman was playing his out-of-tune guitar.
Luckily he caught a Tuna
Where did the music teacher leave her keys?
In the piano.
I've recently started up a band called "Mum's The Word."
If anyone asks, you've not seen us.
What do you get when you cross a fridge with a radio? Cool Music
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
Why did the skeleton want to join band?
He wanted a trom-bone!
I really like guitars
They just strike a chord with me.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
What’s the difference between a violin and a fiddle?
One has strings and the other has strangs.
What’s the first thing a musician says at work?
“Would you like fries with that?”
How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
I used to think that all radios had antennae, then I realized it was a stereo type.
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
Our church band is just two ladies on percussion...
It’s quite the CoNunDrum
When did the pianist finally turn their life around?
After they hit Rockbottomoff.
Being a soprano is a great opera tunity.
I found this amazing bluegrass band that does covers of 80s rock.
They call themselves Ban Jovi.
What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music.
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Drums - You can't beat 'em. Well, you have to, really.
What do you call a boy and girl playing blues music? The battle of the saxes.
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
Have you heard about the new band located in the north east of england?
They're called Durham Durham.
Why did the burglars decide to rob a music store?
For the lute.
What is the difference between a saxophone and a lawnmower? Vibrato.
Why did the jazz musician refuse to be quarantined?
Cause he was an outdoor cat.
Did you hear about the new Smashing Pumpkins cover band?
They call themselves Squished Squash!
I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia that makes me deny the existence of certain 80's bands.
There is no cure.
What's worse than a SPIDER on your PIANO?
CRAB on your ORGAN.
I bought an old stereo.
My wife has her doubts, but I think it's a sound investment.
How do you fix a broken tuba?
With a tuba glue.