Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet.
I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
I read a story about pig anatomy.
It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
Why couldn’t the pig tie his shoelaces? He was too ham-fisted.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
What kind of work do pigs do after school?
Hamwork.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
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