Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office?
He was the first Porkmaster General.
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
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