Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail?
“That’s the end of me!”
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
What happened when the pig pen broke?
They had to use the pig pencil.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
Why do pigs make awful football players?
They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
What kind of work do pigs do after school?
Hamwork.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Why was the pig a pathological liar? It’s a porcine-ality disorder.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game?
For playing dirty.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
I read a story about pig anatomy.
It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
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