Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet.
I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What happened when the pig pen broke?
They had to use the pig pencil.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
What did Mama pig ask her kids every day after school?
“Hoofeels hungry?”
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
I read a story about pig anatomy.
It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
Why was the pig a pathological liar? It’s a porcine-ality disorder.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office?
He was the first Porkmaster General.