What does a panda use to cook his pancakes?
A pan duhhhh!
What’s black and white and bounces?
A rubber panda.
Did you hear about the party at the Chinese zoo?
It was Panda-monium.
What do you give a panda when it is sick?
Pandadol.
Why did the bear quit his job at the daycare center?
It was panda-monium.
Why do pandas have fur coats?
Because they’d look stupid in denim jackets.
What’s black and white and goes up and down?
A panda who’s stuck in a lift.
What goes black, white, black, white, black, white?
A panda rolling down a hill.
Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Because its mother panda’d to its every whim!
What do you call a large group of sick pandas?
A Pandamic.
What’s a Chinese bear’s favorite organ of the body?
The panda-creas.
What did the panda say when he was forced out of his natural habitat?
This is un-bear-able.
How do you make a panda?
Punch a polar bear in the eyes.
What happened when they planted new bamboo trees at the zoo?
It was pandamonium out there!
Why do pandas love watching classic movies?
Because they are in black and white.
What’s black and white and yellow?
A cowardly panda.
What do you call a panda who’s lost his dinner?
Bamboozled.
What goes white black white black white black red?
A panda that falls from a cliff.
What’s black and white, has four legs and a trunk?
Two pandas on holiday.
What’s black and white and goes round and round?
A panda stuck in a revolving door.
Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they’re in black and white.
Did you hear about the panda that had a slight stutter?
Seems it’s a story that bears repeating.
What is the difference between a panda and a polar bear?
About 1,000 miles.
What’s black and white and very noisy?
A panda with a set of drums.
I asked a panda if he was my friend.
He said, “Just bearly”.
What’s black and white and stands in the corner?
A naughty panda.
What do Chinese bears wear over their faces when they’re robbing banks?
Pandanas!
What’s black and white and as hard as a rock?
A panda that’s fallen in cement.
What do Chinese bears eat for breakfast?
Panda-cakes!
What do you call a bear that jumps but never lands?
Peter Panda.
What’s black and white, has eight wheels and travels very fast?
A panda on roller skates.
Why did the panda’s joke suck?
It was unbearable.
Did you know that you only need two letters to spell Panda?
You just need P and A.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A sunburned panda.
What’s black and white with red spots?
A panda with the measles.
What does a ghost panda eat?
BamBOO!