Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
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