What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
Why couldn’t the old cat see? He suffered from car-aracts
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
What do kittens wear? Dia-purrs!
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
What did the mom say to her kitten when she caught him slouching? Paw attention to your paw-sture!
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What is a cat’s favorite Tom Hanks character? Furrest Gump.
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
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