What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What type of cat will keep your garden looking nice and tidy? A lawn meower.
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
What does a cat say when it gets injured? MeOWWW!
What’s the difference between a comma and a cat?
One has the paws before the claws, the other has the clause before the pause.
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? None, because they were all copycats!
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What is a cat’s favorite Tom Hanks character? Furrest Gump.
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What did the cat do to someone she had wronged? She a-paw-logized.
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
My husband was allergic to my cat so I knew I had to get rid of him… so I’m looking to rehome Gerry, he’s thirty-five and works in accounting!
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
What is a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
Why was the cat not allowed on the computer? Because she tried to catch the mouse!
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
What steps do you take when you see a tiger running towards you? Big ones!
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
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