Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What do kittens wear? Dia-purrs!
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
What is a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
What did the cat do to someone she had wronged? She a-paw-logized.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
My husband was allergic to my cat so I knew I had to get rid of him… so I’m looking to rehome Gerry, he’s thirty-five and works in accounting!
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What do cats do after watching a play? Give a round of a-paws.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
Where did the independent cat decide to live? In Catalonia!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.