Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What did Shakespeare say when he was angry with his Dalmatian?
Out, out, damned spot.
What did the happy kitten say? I’m feline good!
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
What do you call a funny snake?
Hissssssterical.
How did the beaver introduce his wife? This is my significant otter.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
When is a car like a frog?
When it's being toad.
Where do dinosaurs get their mail ? At the dead-letter office!
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q: What did the sign for the party for beavers say?
A: Beaver or be square.
What kind of cheese do rodents like?
Mousearella.
what do you call it when a lady mammal that enjoys swimming a lot, who has an unattractive twin sister, fires a gun at one of her gym buddies who also happens to work with clay as their profession?
hotter water otter daughter shot her potter spotter
I told the other alligator to stay outside, he cai-man anyway.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
What’s black and white with red spots?
A panda with the measles.
Why did the fish cross the road?
The chicken had the days off!
What did one flea say to the other?
Shall we walk, or shall we take the dog?
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs bunny
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
So what did the Mother bee say to her misbehaving bee son
"Beehive!"
Where do rabbits learn how to fly? In the hare force!
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
What kind of sharks make good carpenters?
Hammerheads.
I was milking a cow and a fly flew in its ear.
I thought, that’s weird, I just kept milking. A while later, the same fly showed up in the milk bucket. I guess that’s what they say: in one ear, out the udder.
I'm going to combine my interests of taxidermy and bomb making
by making you an otter you can't defuse.
What did the beaver say to the river? Meet me around the bend.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What says “Quick, Quick”?
A duck with the hiccups
Why doesn't McDonald's serve escargot? Because it's not fast food.
The next round the wolf showed up at the butchery, he was arrested. This is because he was being tracked by the police for chop lifting.
What's green, green, green, green, green?
A frog rolling down a hill.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
Where do you get frog's eggs?
At the spawn shop.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fishually impaired.
What type of sandals do frogs wear?
Open-toad!
How do you save a drowning otter? Take your foot of its head
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
Why do giraffes have long necks?
Because their feet smell.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
What was the snail doing on the highway? About one mile a day!
What do you call a monkey who can’t keep a secret?
A blab-boon.
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside
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