What did the duck who learned physics say?
Quark, quark.
Evolution is so strange. Dolphins started off as sea creatures, then evolved to have legs, only to eventually return to the sea and lose them.
Kinda defeets the porpoise, don't you think?
What do you get when a dinosaur blows it's nose? OUT of the way!!
I like you, you croc my world.
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
When it’s raining, a turtle goes to a shell-ter.
What do you call a blind dinosaur? adoyouthinkhesaurus.
What do you call a bee who never brags?
A humble-bee
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
What does a tiger say to his friends before eating a meal? "Let us prey!"
Can birds sell cereal to children?
I don't know if one can, but toucan.
What do you call it when a dinosaur gets in a car accident? Tyrannasaurus wreck!
How do you invite a dinosaur for lunch?
Tea, Rex?
How did the close race between the rabbit and the tortoise end? It was won by a hare!
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
We were all sturtled by the incoming news.
Turtles love taking shell-fies.
When you cross a wolf and Fred Astaire, you get dances with wolves.
What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug?
Pulled pork!
What happened when they planted new bamboo trees at the zoo?
It was pandamonium out there!
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
How do you make a telephone in the jungle?
With toucans and a piece of string.
Have you seen my lobster?
I'm worried he might by a lost claws.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
What is a koala’s favorite pop singer? Koala Rae Jepsen. Her most popular song? “Koala Me Maybe”.
How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? Down in the mouth.
A teacher asks the class to name six mammals that you might find in Africa. One of the pupils replies, “five zebras and a lion”.
What do Chinese bears eat for breakfast?
Panda-cakes!
A gang of ravens scared off individual crows and cornered them together. Well, you can say that a conspiracy of ravens preplanned a murder of crows.
What would you call a dream where a koala bear is eating you? A bite-mare.
What do you call a guy who believes in ethical treatment of spiders?
Peta Parker.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
Why didn't the T-rex skeleton attack the museum visitors? Because she had no guts!
What does a French beaver call his dam? Ma'dame.
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
What do you call a mouse who can pick up a horse? Sir!
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.
Did you guys know that dolphins attack seals for sport?
It's almost like they do it on porpoise.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
How do you know you’ve been visited by a possessed rabbit? He leaves deviled eggs.
How did the beaver build the insides of a dam using logs? He logged in.
A group of crows placed evenly between two margins is definitely a justified murder.
Why do pandas have fur coats?
Because they’d look stupid in denim jackets.
A kid at the spelling bee was asked to spell "inward"
A teacher tackled him after the first G
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
Where do bad beavers go?
They're dammed to hell.
My son asked me, "Daddy, why do bees stay in the hive in the winter?" I smiled and answered...
"Swarm."
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
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