What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
What’s a bats favorite desert?
I-Scream!
What animals were last to leave the ark?
The elephants as they had to pack their trunks.
He has some good puns on crows, but he doesn’t have to keep crowing about it.
What do you call a fascist mosquito?
Benito Mosquitollini.
Dolphins don't have accidents.
They do everything on porpoise.
Do you know where you take a sick squid?
To the doctopus.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
I was at the beach today when I saw a man in the sea yelling “Help, shark! Help!”
I just laughed. I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
How do you make a panda?
Punch a polar bear in the eyes.
Who is a snake’s favorite actor?
Humphrey Boa-gart.
What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
A croaker spaniel.
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
Riding a camel really isn't as hard as they say it is.
Once you get over the first hump, the rest is easy.
Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw?
Because they don’t know how to cook it.
I killed a spider with soap
He got a clean death.
What’s a llama’s favorite movie?
Alpacalypse Now.
What do you call an electrically charged seal?
A seal ion.
What happened to the shark who swallowed a bunch of keys?
It got lockjaw.
I like dillos, but do not support giving them guns.
I would never armadillo.
What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear?
Anything you want, he can’t hear you.
A wolf that uses bad language is known as a swearwolf.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
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