Jellyfish and peanut butterare sea turtles favorite sandwich.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
Why did the firefighters bring a dog along with them?
To help them find the nearest fire hydrant.
What do koalas do when they see social injustice happening in the world? They fight for ekoalaty!
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Why are parrots so good at imitations? They love parrot-y! (parody)
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a plane?
A Boeing constrictor.
Sorry we missed puppy class.
My dog was wagging. There goes his oppawtunity for pawfect attendance…
I would rather breed mice than crows
Mischief is one thing, but I don't think I can pull off a murder.
When should you stop for a glow worm? When he has a red light.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
Which condiment is a mouse’s favourite?
Mouse-tard.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a frog?
A jump rope.
What do you get if you cross a giraffe and a hedgehog?
An extra long toilet brush.
I got an email today saying I could win $10,000 in a fishing competition.
But I'm sure there's a catch involved somewhere.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Have you ever heard of the Crows Law Of Energy Conservation?
It's also known as the Law of Caws and Effect.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
My friend’s parrot lost his beak in a fan accident and he wanted to find a prosthetic. I sent him to my Uncle Tony.
He fits the bill.
What is it when one cow spies on another cow?
A steak out.
Which birds go to church a lot?
Birds of pray.
The pun class we attended totally tortoise nothing.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
Why did the bunny eat the wedding ring? Because he heard it was 18 carrots.
Her: "Buffalo meat is delicious. What are they made of? Beef?"
Me: "No... They're made of buff."
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
Why don’t dolphin do well on school tests?
Because they work below C-Level!
Who cleans all the mess created by beavers after their beach trip? Mer-maids.
What did the Inuit say to to Englishman After he wanted some seal?
"I've got Nunavut."
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
Where did the hamsters invade the beaver colony? Hamsterdam.
What did the Tyrannosaurus rex get after mopping the floor? Dino-sore!
Each time the cow escaped, the farmer would find him hiding in Moo York City.
What type of cat will keep your garden looking nice and tidy? A lawn meower.
What kind of dinosaur works for the police? A trisara-cop.
Why are tigers striped? Because they never want to be spotted.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
What do you call it when evil worms take over the world?
Global Worming!
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
What sea creature never tells the truth
A lion fish.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise?
Bearobics.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
Did you guys hear about the camel that got a gig playing a cow on Broadway?
She was a real drama dairy.
Which Halloween treat is going to keep a crow up all night? A crowfee apple.
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