Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
It was a crocadoodledoo.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because all of the cows have horns
What do you get when a dinosaur blows it's nose? OUT of the way!!
What type of snake does a baby play with?
A rattlesnake.
Escaped snakes make some people hiss-terical.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear.
What do llamas do when they eat outside together?
They have an alpacanic.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
Why don’t dolphin do well on school tests?
Because they work below C-Level!
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
What do you call a parrot that flew away?
A polygon.
Beavers are the best at getting things done on riverbanks. They have their own waves of working.
What happened when a bat misbehaved in night school?
She got suspended.
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
Young goats should be careful when they're out and and about and shouldn't jump into a stranger's car.
That's how you get kidnapped.
Why did the beaver stop cutting down trees?
The work gave him gnawsea
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
Who is a beaver's most favorite pop singer ever? Justin Beaver.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What is the opposite of a flamingo? The answer is, a flaminstop.
Where’s a dolphin’s favorite place to drink?
A dive bar!
What animal can go into a tiger’s den and came out alive?
The tiger.
Today I went to the bee store
And I wanted 12 bee's but when I checked out the cashier gave me 13 and I asked him why he gave me 13 instead of 12 and he said it was a free bee.
What did the rabbit say to its wife? No bunny compares to you.
What does the queen bee of every hive tell their workers to do?
She tells them to bee productive.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
What do you call a hamster in between two slices of bread?
A ham sandwich.
What type of dog would be the best at portraying Tina Turner?
An Angela Bassett Hound.
Did you hear about the incident at the tiger exhibit?
It was a big cat-astrophe
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.
What do you call a food stamp inside of a burrito? An otter fortune cookie
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
Why did the monkey like the banana?
Because it had appeal.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
What did the llama say when he found out he had been robbed?
“I’ve been fleeced!”
What kind of bee makes milk?
A Boobie!
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