What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey?
A Kick-Ass
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.