What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey?
A Kick-Ass
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.