What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
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