What do dogs and Santa have in common?
They are both seen Dachshund through the snow.
Why did the dog go to university? To get a pe-digree.
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
Konnichihuahua.
My dog got a promotion.
She’s now a branch manager.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
My neighbor had way too many dogs.
It’s safe to say that he had a Rover-dose.
My dog’s favorite band is The Beagles.
Where should you never take your dogs shopping?
The flea market.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
My dog takes so long to get ready. He can never chews what to wear.
Have you seen the new movie with the Dachshund?
Apparently it’s an Oscar Weiner.
What do you do when your dog chews a dictionary?
Take the words out of his mouth.
Why do dogs find it hard to work the TV remote?
Because they always hit the paws button.
What happens when you cross an Australian dog and a Beatle?
Dingo Starr.
Who was the greatest dog detective?
Sherlock Bones.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What type of dog can use a phone?
A dial-matian.
What breed of dog will laugh at any joke?
A Chi-ha-ha
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
My dog hates the rain.
He doesn’t want to step in a poodle.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
What did the cowboy say when his dog ran away?
Now wait just a doggone minute.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
What’s a dog’s favorite condiment?
Fetch-up.
Have you ever heard of Pavlov’s dog?
Yeah, he rings a bell
What do you call someone who loves dogs?
A pug addict.
What do you call an old dog?
Grandpaw.
How does a Spanish dog say Merry Christmas?
Feliz navi-dog.
What do dog scientists to with their bones?
They barium.
What was the puppy's costume for Halloween?
The Big Bad Woof.
Why don’t dogs bark at their feet?
It isn’t polite to talk back to your paw.
Did you hear the story about a Golden Retriever who brought a ball back from miles away?
It was far-fetched.
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
What did the puppy say to his mum?
I woof you.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
What did the dog order at a restaurant?
His owner’s homework.
What is a dog’s favorite pizza topping?
Pup-peroni.
What type of dog chases anything red?
A bull dog.
Why did the dog walk in to the saloon?
He was looking for the man who shot his paw
What type of dog would be the best at portraying Tina Turner?
An Angela Bassett Hound.
The expensive dog has gone missing.
However, police are saying that at least they have a lead. Once she is found they will Retriever.
What is a dog’s favorite brand of whiskey?
Jack Spaniels.
What do you call a large dog that meditates?
Aware wolf.
What was Muhammad Ali’s favorite breed of dog?
A boxer.
My dog needed date ideas.
I told him to whine and dine her.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?
A bud hound.
What do you call a dog who can fight?
A Boxer.
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