Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. How do the doe and stag open the entry to their vacation cabin in the woods?
A. They just turn the deer knob.
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want — he can’t hear you.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. After the stripper is done, what happens at a stag party?
A. Deer-ty dancing.
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
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