Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
How do you let a deer know you like her?
You fawn over her.
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
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