What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
Why did the mother cow give the sleepy baby cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because all of the cows have horns
Why is it a bad idea to give a cow marijuana?
The steaks are too high.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What would you hear at a cow concert?
Moo-sic.
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
How do you make a milkshake?
Give a cow a pogo stick.
Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
What do you call an evil cow?
De-mooooon.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?
Cowboom.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Each time the cow escaped, the farmer would find him hiding in Moo York City.
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalfeinated.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
If you mix a ghost and a cow together, you will create vanishing cream.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!