I warned farmer Brown not to pamper that cow too much because it would wind up giving spoiled milk.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalfeinated.
What South American dance do cows like to do?
The Rump-a.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What would you hear at a cow concert?
Moo-sic.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
The story of the chicken and cow running away together sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
If you mix a ghost and a cow together, you will create vanishing cream.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
Why was the cow always exercising? To build up its moo-scles
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.