What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
How does a baby beetle get around?
In a buggy.
What do you call an owl with a deep voice?
A growl.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?
Squeaky clean!
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
Q: What time is it when a tiger walks into the room?
A: Time to get out of the room.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
How does a dog stop a TV show?
He presses paws.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
Have you heard the joke about the giraffe’s neck?
Let me warn you, it’s a long one.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
Two flies were fighting on a toilet seat.
One got pissed.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What do tigers sing at Christmas?
Jungle bells! Jungle bells!
What do you call a funny parrot spoof
A parody
What does a well-educated owl say?
Whom.
I once tried crossing a flamingo with a cement mixer. Sounds crazy, but I really wanted a good brick layer.
What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? “We’re going to take a small paws for our sponsors.”
Beavers are the best at getting things done on riverbanks. They have their own waves of working.
What is a flamingo's favorite ride at a theme park? The flamingo-karts.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
When milking a nervous goat, you should use kid gloves.
What did the Golden Retriever say to the beautiful poodle?
You’re looking very fetching.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
Why don't turkeys like math?
Because when they added three to five...
They got Ate.
---
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?
Enough drumstics for a month.
What's a camel's favorite part of a meal?
Desert!
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
Why won't the dog listen to the farmer's sheep jokes?
He's herd them all.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
Being shellfless entails volunteering at the relief center during disaster.
Crows love Cawnie Chung, their favorite reporter.
What family does Maiasaur belong to? I don't think any families in our neighborhood have one!
What has a spiked tail, plates on its back, and sixteen wheels? A Stegosaurus on roller skates!
What do you call an animal you keep in your car?
A Carpet
What do you call a dinosaur that's a loud sleeper? A Snore-a-sorus
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
‘I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!’
If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one? Goblet.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
What is a parrot's favourite colour shade?
Polly-chromatic
Go to BabaMail
