Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
What’s a whale’s favorite meal?
Fish and ships.
Mistakes happen.
No need to terrier-self up about it.
What is a flamingo's favorite ride at a theme park? The flamingo-karts.
What do fish use for money?
Sand dollars!
Crows go, listen, perform, and enjoy live music, at cawnsorts.
What do rabbits put in their computers? Hoppy disks!
A saber tooth tiger would never blow anything up.
But a dino might.
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? A dirty kid.
Where does a dinosaur lay in the sun? At the dino-shore
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
When fishing, is there ever a good reason to take the worm off the hook?
I guess that’s debaitable.
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with some beer?
Light ale!
Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
What goes eek, eek, bang?
A mouse in a minefield!
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
A kid at the spelling bee was asked to spell "inward"
A teacher tackled him after the first G
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
Who is the worm's Prime Minister? Maggot Thatcher.
How do flamingos clean themselves? They flaminget a shower.
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What do you call a fish that floats on the surface?
Bob.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all watching a dolphin do some excellent tricks.
The dolphin notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he jumps higher out of the water and calls out, 'Can you all see me now?' And they respond: 'Yes.' 'Oui.' 'Sí.' 'Ja.'
What is a lion’s favourite cheese?
Roarquefort
Q: How does a tiger stop a video?
A: By pressing paws.
What do you get when you cross a tortoise and a llama?
A turtle-neck sweater.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
Why do you never see koalas wearing shoes? Because they love going bearfoot.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
Crows, they just love sports, crow-quet to be precise.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
The flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage was a true definition of murder most foul.
When you come across a werewolf with no legs, how do you call it? Call it anything because it cannot chase you!
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
Why did one camel spit and stomp when the other camel stole its cheese?
Because they’re “dramadairies”
A zebra is the safest place to cross the road. Unless you are actually a zebra.
How do you get a one-armed monkey out of a tree?
Wave to it.
What do you give a panda when it is sick?
Pandadol.
What did one frog say.to the other?
Time's sure fun when you're having flies.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
Why are beavers only found in freshwaters? Because they don't like stale water.
What is worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
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