Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
What type of tool does a prehistoric reptile carpenter use? A dino-saw!
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws and a complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
What did one beaver say to the other at the river? Dam it.
I used to own a rabbit, but now he’s just some bunny that I used to know.
What do you do if a rabbit keeps pooping in your yard? Take him to a pellet court.
Which dinosaurs were the best policemen? Tricera-cops.
What do you call a dinosaur that's a noisy sleeper? A Bronto-snorus.
What kind of shark is always gambling?
A card shark.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
How did the tigers greet the other animals in the jungle? "Hey! Pleased to eat you."
Why do seals swim in salt water ?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
What do you call a thirsty camel ?
A dry humper.
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
Where do fish wash?
In a river basin.
What do you call a poor ant?
A peas-ant.
What do you call a koala with no teeth? A gummy bear.
I told my parents I wanted to raise goats for a living, but I was only kidding.
Why was the conservative buffalo disappointed in his child?
He was a bison.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What do you call a parrot that won’t eat?
A Polly-no-meal.
What breed of dog always gets cold?
A Bichon Freeze.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks: “Is this stool taken?”
Why are rabbits so lucky? They have four rabbit’s feet.
What made the dinosaur's car stop ? A flat Tire-annosaurus
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
The public investigated a box full of crows because it was a murder case.
I recently took a trip to Alaska. We ate at a fancy restaurant where the chef made us an amazing meal from native animals and vegetables we helped forage. I asked if he had ever had whale blubber or seal meat.
He said "nah, I’m not really Inuit."
What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a plane?
A Boeing constrictor.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
What do dogs eat for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
A snapping turtle is a turtle that takes up pgotography.
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
Why did the rabbit like the adventure? It was a “hare-raising tail.”
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done!
Where do otters come from?
Otter Space.
Why are dinosaurs no longer around? Because their eggs stink.
What kind of aquatic animal thinks you did a good job?
The seal of approval.
What's a frog's favorite game?
Croak-et.
What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
Some see a puddle of mosquito larva.
I see a pool of enbitenment.
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
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