What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What's a bats favorite desert? I-Scream!
What do you call two monkeys sharing an Amazon account?
Prime-Mates!
What did the snake give to his wife?
A goodnight hiss.
I told my wife that I saw a sheep pondering its place in the world.
She asked me, “Can ewe even imagine?”
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
Knock Knock!
Who is there?
Water.
Water who?
Water your plans for the weekend, Mr Beaver?
Why did the worm leave the Apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
What was the most flexible dinosaur? Tyrannosaurus Flex.
What do you call a wasp who is having a bad hair day?
A frizz-bee
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
What do you call a rabbit that has fleas?
Bugs bunny.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
When is the best time to paint a dog?
When they're asleep.
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
Making puns ha?
Toucan play that game.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
A weeping camel is known as a humpback wail.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What did the duck eat for snack?
Salted Quackers.
There’s a new dish out; it’s a cross between a cake and a bird. They call it a Flan-ingo.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
Why is earth worm humor offensive?
They only know dirty jokes.
Do you know how long dinosaurs should be fed? Exactly the same as short dinosaurs.
What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A pair of swimming trunks.
What weighs 800 pounds and sticks to the roof of your mouth ? A peanut butter and Stegosaurus sandwich!
How did the beaver build the insides of a dam using logs? He logged in.
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw?
Because they don’t know how to cook it.
Where do dogs go after the their tails fall off?
The re-tail store.
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
What’s a shark’s favorite movie?
The Shaw-shark Redemption.
How do you upset a dinosaur? Touchasaurus Spot.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny.
What do you call a very smart bunny? An egghead.
What did the owl say to the judge?
I’m talon you, it wasn’t me.
Whale, whale, whale…
If it isn’t a pod.
An owl had a sore throat but wasn't bothered.
He couldn't give a hoot.
I bought a bunny because everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
Why did the duck detective get the key to the city?
Because he quacked the case.
Sometimes we eat a crow while other times we eat Croatia.
My dog went on his first date.
But she was a mal-TEASE.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A sunburned panda.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in a school.
Why did the chimpanzee cross the road?
Because he had to take care of some monkey business.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
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