What do you call a parrot with an umbrella? Polly unsaturated.
What do you call a otter that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
Q: Why are tigers religious?
A: Because they prey frequently, and prey as a family!
How does an octopus go to war?
Well armed.
Would you mind watching my pet parrot while I’m out, as long as it’s not too much of a birden?
What did the puppy say to his mum?
I woof you.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
Dolphins don't have accidents.
They do everything on porpoise.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
What are the fastest fish in the river? The motor-pike with a side-carp!
Why do dinosaurs eat their food raw? Cause they don't know how to cook
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He wanted to robbit.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
What goes white black white black white black red?
A panda that falls from a cliff.
My sheep-powered computer was starting to run slowly
So I added more ram
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
Did you hear about the woman who complained about her rabbit stew? She said there was a hare in her soup.
What kind of ant is good at math?
An account-ant.
Why did the mouse stay inside? Because it was raining cats and dogs.
What happened when the tiger ate the comedian?
He felt funny!
Did you hear the gossip about the owl who hooked up with his boss?
I won’t tell you hoo.
Why did the two bears break up at the North Pole?
They were polar opposites.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What is a seals favorite subject?
Art Art Art Art!
Police are investigating a string of homicides which have occurred over the last two weeks. The victims have identified as Cap'n Crunch, Toucan Sam, Tony the Tiger, and the latest victim, Lucky the Leprechaun.
They are looking for a cereal killer.
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
Did you hear about the snake who wrote a love letter to his girlfriend?
He sealed it with a hiss.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
Why was the cat not allowed on the computer? Because she tried to catch the mouse!
What's the most common form of owl-on-owl violence?
Drive by hooting.
Why are tigers striped? Because they never want to be spotted.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What do you get when you cross a parrot and a shark?
A bird that talks your ears off.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
Why did the parrot cross the road? Just beak-ause!
Did you guys know that dolphins attack seals for sport?
It's almost like they do it on porpoise.
What kind of eels can travel on land?
Wheels.
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
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